When I sat down to write the song that came to mind was Musiq Soulchild’s Love. I thought about this perfect ballad because it allows for a much larger vision of love that includes all manner of relationships including the one we have with ourselves. Soulchild sings… Love So many people use your name in […]
Category: Self-Care
“Grounded and Ready To Soar”: Notes From the 2013 CFC Retreat
The business of our everyday lives (jobs, mothering, aunt-ing, loving and making love, creating and tearing down (oppressions), building and holding up, going in and coming out, taking care of ourselves and others, etc.) has been strenuous over the past 23 months. The CFC has grown exponentially since our March 2010 launch. In 2012 we added […]
You Made it Happen! An Update on our Giving Campaign
Hey, family! We just wanted to thank you for all of your support of our giving campaign. With your generous donations we will be able to have a fabulous, energizing retreat that will enable us to continue to do the work we love and to dream up new and innovative ways to get crunk! Your […]
Chasing Time: A Reflection of Thanks(giving)
Time flies whether you are having fun or not. My childhood seemed to linger like thick molasses while my twenties flew by like short school days. Before I knew it I was post-30, highly educated, minimally motivated, hundreds of miles away from home but finally at home with myself. When I turned thirty I had […]
so far to go: a mix on finding your way
Listen, this isn’t what I expected: adult-onset acne, speech and eating disorders. I would have been struck dumb had you asked me to forecast these grown-up times in my ponytailed private school days. I daydreamed a lot but my imagined life was clipped: a timid choose your own adventure whose stalled plot was as foreseeable […]
On Anger…
This post does not contain images because I don’t want to animate the stereotype, but in Google image searches for “Sapphire” and “Angry Black Woman,” Michelle Obama was prominently featured. In a brilliantly provocative paper at ASALH this year, Dr. Gwendolyn Pough invited us to rethink the black woman stereotype of Sapphire, the emasculating black […]
Throwback Thursday Remix: How to Say No…And When to Say Yes!
(This entry combines a previous entry, dated March 14, 2011, with a new reflection). Saying No It took me years to unlearn the habit of saying yes automatically when someone asked me for (or to do) something. So often had that single syllable fallen from my tongue that I would often agree to things before […]
Memories, survival and safety
TRIGGER WARNING This post contains information about sexual violence that may be triggering to survivors. I know if feels like I been gone for a minute but now I’m back, green tea on ice with a fitted. 🙂 Mi familia, it has been a while since I last posted. I have to be honest, for […]
Throwback Thursday: no strings
In as many days I have had conversations with two homegirls who are negotiating the complications of no-strings-turned-tangled situations with could-be, should be, damn near would be lovers. Sex is serious business. Because while everybody should be able to get their physical needs met, there are other, more complicated and tangled needs wrapped up somewhere between tight thighs […]
Throwback Thursday: A Love Poem for Single Mothers
Hey girl, I’m calling Cause I got your text Seems you might need a hug And a minute to vent So you spent one more night Trying to find the words To explain that joint parenting Means JOINT WORK! That what he can’t pay for Can be supplemented with time Especially since you’re working And […]